Change IS good...

I was reading Margie's blog this morning and she got me thinking... I have been talking an awful lot about change in my daily life lately... and the really cool thing I realized is this... CHANGE IS GOOD. Plain and simple. Most people fear it, fear the outcome it may bring. But doing something different with your life, from the smallest to the largest things is doing SOMETHING... and that feels good to me. I look back at how DIFFERENT my life was 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 1 year ago.. man the changes I have made!

10 years ago I was reeling from my wedding, my mom's death 4 days later and her funeral 1 week after that. Upset at the fact that my step-dad had been arrested AT her funeral and at that time was currently in jail. I was freaking out at the fact that while I had always taken care of my brother, I was now COMPLETELY taking care of him. I was scared, confused and worried. Worried at how my brother was dealing with our mom's death and step-dad's jailing. Worried at how Jason and I were going to make things ok as a family with all of the loss and stress going on. I was angry that my mom wasn't there to see me get married, that she died before I could really get to know her, that my family members were such hypocrits and attention getters. ugh

5 years ago I was just 10 days away from giving birth to my 2nd child.. my son. I was relaxed in my pregnancy, confident in my ability to mother, excited to meet this new person. My brother was in college, spending his free time finding out who he was spiritually and mentally. My husband loved me and we were happy. Alea was in pre-school and was such a joy.. most days! We were living with my father in law and anticipating our new arrival, and eventual purchase of our first home. While there was a bit of tension in that house (we only lasted 4 months there), there was an air of excitement at the changes to come. Life was good.

1 year ago I was happily working at Scrapbook Junction... blissfully unaware that in 1 month.. just 1 month I would make one of the biggest decisions of my life and purchase the store from Lynda. We would take a chance and hope for the best. I was a little nervous about my impending lack of employment, but I was also excited to look for somewhere new, somewhere to meet new people and expand my horizons. The kids were great, both in school and doing well. My brother was now at the university, with only 1 year left before he graduated. Jason still loved me and was doing awesome at work. We didn't want for anything but maybe a bit more time together as a family. Again, life was good.

4 months ago my life changed again. I found my spirtuality. I started finding out who I REALLY was. Who I had been and who I wanted to become. Jason was right there with me. He was tapping into places he had never been within himself. Cory was our guidence counselor and classmate all at the same time. The 3 of us have never bonded more closely than when we did at Christmas time. The months since have been a struggle and awakening.. it is amazing. I am constantly reminded at how blessed I truly am. To have family and friends who love me. To be able to come to work (ha ha) everyday and love what I am doing. TO BE ME.

This makes me want to scrapbook... good thing I am here at the store today... LOL